Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Friday, April 18, 2025

When A Genre Inspires

I grew up on 80s-90s romantic comedies, and let me tell ya, those movies and TV shows were so unfunny, so harmful, and so toxic, that I wasn't a fan of the genre for so long. 

And then, I found South Korean TV shows and series, what we here in the US lump together as "K-Dramas".

The Korean shows seemed to emphasize healthier relationships and the misunderstandings between people's personality types or societal ideas about intimacy, sex, and other heteronormative standards. 
Not saying they were blameless and promoting hardcore feminist, womanist, and egalitarian values. These rom-coms were still based on stereotypes about what happens between a cisgender and heteronormative relationship, but the better written ones would spin these ideals and norms on their head. Or have a deeper indictment about how such romantic relationships are seen through a Korean society prism.

All in all, though imperfect in many ways, viewing such culturally different storytelling helped broaden my own storytelling skills.

Saturday, March 9, 2024

What To Expect With My Main Couple...

Yanina and Peter are an interracial couple. 

She is white and first/second-generation Eastern-European American. 

He is Black and multiple-generation African-American and Caribbean-American.

Yanina is from working-to-middle-class people. Her family began late in the 20th century to arrive in the US from political upheaval in Eastern Europe. Elders worked in factories and mills in the new country to eventually starting their own businesses and branching out on a whole in different fields. They still remember their Eastern-European roots by frequenting other Eastern-European cultural businesses, eateries, as well as creating opportunities within their communities.

Peter is from upper-class people. His family is Old Money. Between ancestors buying loved ones early to live in small enclaves, outsmarting the system, investing amongst themselves and in the broader American scale, helping other Black people to build larger communities as well as intermarrying monied West Indians and wealthy Africans, his family's different branches are at varying levels of wealth.

~  ~  ~  ~

I have established that Yanina grows up in a lower-middle income neighborhood. She is also around different ethnic groups. Her friendship circle has been diverse.

One thing I wanted to establish is when Yanina and Peter are dating, that he IS NOT the first Black person she has interacted with! Though I'm a sucker for interracial romance, I can't stand that trope, and it is usually with a white person dating outside, that this is the first encounter of the 'other' when they end up in a romantic relationship!

Now, I understand certain cultures discourage inter-dating, and even dating on a whole. Those are exceptions. What I will not tolerate in the stories I enjoy is when the white (or any other race/ethnicity) character is inter-dating someone and they have NEVER interacted with those people beforehand! Especially when the character lives in a multicultural community!

I can understand if you've never dated an Eastern-European, but, depending on where you live, I'm sure you've gone to school with/bought from/or even been assisted in a medical office by someone who is Polish, Ukrainian, Lithuanian, or Russian. 

You don't know how annoyed I get when, in most comedy shows, the white character dates someone outside their race, and they say "I have never interacted with someone like you before!" No no no no no no NO. 

Though Yanina dating Peter is dating a Black person for the first time, it is NOT her first time being around Black people. She's had Black schoolmates, she has Black friends (NOT 1. Or 2. Or 3. She has MANY). She's had Black teachers, and, as an adult, has Black coworkers. She also is an aspiring spoken word poet and looks up to many poets, not all of them white, and her mentors are Black and from other ethnicities as well.

As I said before, there are always exceptions and valid excuses, but it gets annoying when there are obviously other folks in these characters' worlds and they only interact with them when they're dating or in a romantic relationship with them? 

So, my question to those other stories: if that couple breaks up, does the character NEVER EVER INTERACT with that group again? 

Makes no sense! Especially when one lives in communities that are often than not, diverse.

Thank you for allowing me to rant, dear readers and we will see each other again!

Friday, September 29, 2017

Best of 2017 - Part Three

NOTE: Here, there be hyperlinks!

In honor of Banned Books Week, which will conclude tomorrow, I am posting my Best of 2017 books that have simply blown my mind (and that's not an easy thing to do, though I feel my tastes are wide-spread enough that I'm often more satisfied than disappointed) and wish to share my findings with my readers and visitors...

Next is The Secret Loves of Geek Girls anthology and The Secret Loves of Geeks a sequel that will be out in 2018!

I was entranced with this anthology from the get-go. I hugged myself while reading this. For all the other books I'm showcasing, I don't really want to name any favorites as I would want ANY of these books I'm speaking about on a deserted island with me. However, this particular anthology not only showcases four pages of an autobiographical comic by Margaret Atwood but the essays and comic-essays by some of the most notable geek/nerd women in multiple industries. 

The Secret Loves of Geek Girls deals with crushes/infatuations, first love, last love, broken hearts, burgeoning sexuality, puberty, college days, divorces, remarriages, first and only marriages, cohabitation, and romance in all its multilayered beauty and ugliness. 

An eye-opening, page-turner that discusses a margin of what romance and the love life of females who identify as geek and nerd. 

The Secret Loves of Geek Girls is edited by Hope Nicholson and foreword by Kelly Sue DeConnick and front cover illustrator Noelle Stevenson artist for the comic series LumberJanes - Please give this anthology a try!

Info on Banned Books Week here: Banned and Challenged Books

FB is BS

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