Why I Don't Do Creative Work In Public Anymore

Somebody asked the Twitter #WritingCommunity what is one's ideal place to write.

Someone responded they would like to write in a café but instead, prefer dead silence, writing on a couch when everybody else is asleep, and that's practically me!  

I need (total I've belatedly learned doesn't work for me since I'm neurodivergent and I get what are now called 'intrusive thoughts') some silence, white noise, or my countless playlist titles on loop.

I'm also introverted and could never write in a cafe. Too many folks milling around. 

I also draw and can't tell you how many times folks will interrupt while you're working. 

I can people-watch and eavesdrop and later distill into things once I'm home. 

Why I can't, as a creative, do my work out in public is because much of mainstream society doesn’t think creative working is 'work' at all.

That's why in my webcomic, my artist/writer MC prefers the library (like I used to), or she works in the rear of her local bar. Lights low and enough folks talking to create white noise for her. 

Before, she had to field off advances, flirtatious, and pick-up lines, but now she uses them in her own work... And holy cr@p, I think I just came up with another scene I should draft soon! Hahaha 

So Much Is Happening...

Looks like my furry K-pop art will be merging with my Pride Month art. Too much has happened this month and I couldn't keep up my own prompts. This is why I also stopped doing official art prompts.

Why I Left Kpop (but eventually returned)

Being a Kpop(Korean pop music) fan sort of reminds me too much of trying to figure out Algebra. I'm all for how they market to a global audience and make many of their medium accessible to global fans, but the Kpop fandom has thrown me for a loop on how complicated it is to follow.

I came to Jpop(Japanese pop music) via the anime, TV shows, and movies I've enjoyed since childhood, and so Jpop will remain my first love, but I did come through to Kpop through Korean dramas.

Eventually, I saw that, much like the toxic fandom of Japanese idol groups, Kpop, which also spilled into Kdramas, since, oftentimes, a singer would opt to or be contracted to a TV series or film franchise. And how *toxic* you ask?

Well, I like my celebrities, I mean, I adore those I consider myself a fan of, to the point that I watch their interviews, may watch documentaries on them, etc. 

I rarely if ever read the gossip and tabloid stuff because their content offends me. I liken these magazines to wanting to know if one's celebrity ended up with diarrhea once they got food poisoning and trying to figure out if that's how the person will now diet. I don't like this sort of expose. I DID grow up on Entertainment Tonight, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, and Access Hollywood, but I soon gave up on these the more "tabloid-y" they became. 

Kpop fandom became no exception. Soon, I would go on sites like Soompi and Hancinema and fans would be screaming how an actress changed her lipstick or hairstyle. Or, how dare that actor find the love of his life, it should've been me! They need to DIE. I know I'm exaggerating, but, it's pretty close sarcastically to the truth. 

I couldn't go anywhere to read what my latest celebrities were up to without reading what counted for journalism, which was people posting nasty comments, hurling insults, and, even *threats* simply because a celebrity decided they wanted to start eating ice cream which made them gain two inches (some of these Korean celebs are eeny-meeny to a US person like me). 

But why did I leave Kpop for such a long time? People are always rude to celebrities, what's the big deal? 

The big deal is not only did the vitriol from fans start to cause rashes of suicides among the celebrity front, but, then those same toxic fans turned on other fans, bringing in cultural bigotry and racism into the mix. So, this trash had real-world consequences...

But, now I'm back. Somewhat. I'm only dealing with ONE KPOP GROUP and I'm sticking to just enjoying my Korean dramas with a small social media circle, simply tweeting about them and not interacting with the majority of fans. 

I don't need them and I know they *certainly* don't need me.

Dates with my Mom

My earliest happiest memories usually involved the performing arts.

On certain nights, Mom would take me to Poe Park, and we would buy ice cream cones - mine usually vanilla - from the Good Humor® truck.
We would sit on a wooden bench and watch the band play hit tunes in the white gazebo.
The weather would be crisp.
The band wore full uniforms: carmine red with braided gold trim. The bandmaster, with his tall hat, would wave his conductor baton as a wizard, stiff and starched like a wooden soldier or Christmas nutcracker.
Show tunes, marches, all kinds of syncopated beats would pulse through me, and make me remember music that I was too young to understand. The instruments were shiny, glossy, and glinted when swayed around by its musician.

I miss the white gazebo, the vanilla ice cream I can't eat now because of sensitive teeth. I miss seeing that band in carmine red and their shiny instruments. I can't remember the music played. Maybe Souza.
I miss being seven. On Sept. 18 will be my 37th birthday. And I'm sad I can't remember what the bench felt like in Poe Park in New York City in 1982-83.