Was just thinking about the 'lunch ladies' from my middle school cafeteria and how epic those cookies were. As big as my head and came in three flavors: sugar cookies, melty chocolate chip, and double fudge. Even after I went on to high school, my dad still brought some home. Miss him and those cookies.
February comes around and I think about two things: my dad, Valentine's Day, and Chinese New Year.
My dad was diagnosed with stomach cancer in January 2007 after he had to threaten his worthless primary care doctor, a shiftless idiot he should have left years ago. February is especially egregious as the cancer progressed and he underwent surgery. This in turn made the cancer spread. He passed away on February 23, two days before his and mom's anniversary. He was born on February 12th, traditionally Abraham Lincoln's birthday.
During this time, I was in a long-distance relationship- won't do this again. It's not for me- and this as well as deciding to celebrate Chinese New Year was probably those two things that helped get me through this month.
But now that I resigned, I know I will need some other traditions and rituals to perform to handle this month. I'm still holding on to Lunar New Year in mind as it's widely celebrated by a variety of Asian cultures worldwide as well as their diasporic communities. And Valentine's Day wasn't worth much to me though while I was in the long-distance(boyfriend was Asian), I did receive a V-Day gift, one of the few I've received from a significant other.
I'm an introvert and not good at dating. My relationships also don't last as long as I want. I've actually wished I was from a culture that does arrange marriages because I can't stand going on dates. They fill me with dread. And now with how emotionally fraught February is even more for me, no thanks.
Yes, this post was more about me than the memorial posts I've done for my dad in years past, but I just don't have it in me now to do that.
Here are a few photos of my father: Kenneth L. Welsh Sr.:
💔💔 💔
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